One of the toughest things about living many borders away from my family is not getting the chance to create more loving memories with mi mamá. Not only the memories I want for myself now that I am more mature and also a mom, but those I want my girl to have of her Abuela.
I have to admit there’s also a feeling of guilt embedded in me for not having outwardly expressed to my mom just how much I truly love her and value every single thing she did — and does — and decisions she took in her life to make sure my sisters and I had a comfortable, healthy, loving and well-guided life. I am, after all, my mother’s daughter and definitely take after her in the lack of being able to express that love through face-to-face words. We’ve always found a way to let the other one know, but I know it’s always better to say “I love you” when you can see that person in their eyes.
Mami, you can’t see me in the eyes right now, but know that my gift to you this Día de las Madres is this post and these words that come from a deep place of sincerity and a hope that we can find a way to spend this special day together again.
In El Salvador, Mother’s Day is celebrated on May 10th, which also happens to be the day of my birth. Every single year I would have to say “Felicidades” to my mom and get another “Felicidades” in return. As much as this was Mother’s Day, it was hard for me to stop feeling it was more my day. But this year I’m doing it different and I’m sending my mami this post to read before May 10th so I can be the first one to say “Felicidades” and to make sure you know that, just like this Hallmark Greeting above says:
“Today is a good day to honor you — a wonderful woman who’s always thinking of ways to make life better for others. What a gift you are.”
And that’s just it. It’s my turn to honor you. During my 41 years of life you’ve always given of yourself first. You pushed through as a single mom to give me the best bilingual education there was. You always somehow managed to be there for us, even though you had to make it work. Once you remarried things were a bit different for all, but you kept finding ways to make us come first and live a sheltered and protected life because that’s what love meant to you.
“Mamá Ama, Cuida, Enseña y Protege”
You always taught me to be kind, compassionate of others, and that a good demeanor, a smile and good taste can open many doors.
Even though the physical distance is huge, you managed to be here for me when my daughter was born and put up with my crazy first-time-mom idiosyncrasies without passing judgement (at least to my face!).
All Camila knows is that her Abuelita adores her because every moment you’ve shared with her you’ve been the ultimate giving abuelita. The kind of abuela that doesn’t think twice about getting down on her arms and legs to let her nieta ride on a horsey. The kind of abuela that will give the longest massages while reading a bedtime book.
“Gracias, Abuelita, por siempre darme una porción de alegría, una medida de dulzura…y todo, todo tu amor. ¡Te quiero mucho!”
This Mother’s Day, we send you from Los Angeles to El Salvador mucho amor del bueno and a promise to soon have it be said face to face.