CNN’s Anderson Cooper is devoting this whole week to a special report called “Kids on Race: The Hidden Picture.” I don’t have cable, but I just watched the first segment, which aired last night, online and I must confess: I cried.
I don’t know if you’ve watched it, but it was really difficult to watch a bunch of both white and black 6-year-olds — in other words, kids Vanessa’s age — talk about how the color of your skin matters when making friends. It was even harder to realize how unrealistic it is for parents to think that little kids are color-blind. The way these children were speaking about race, it’s obvious that they can totally see that we’re not all the same color and, sadly, many of them start having negative views based on skin color at a tender age.
If you haven’t watched the first segment, I hope you do, so you can see for yourself what’s on the mind of these first-graders, whom I believe are a good representation of all children in this country.
The one point that I found extremely interesting is that the majority of black kids had much more positive views on race and believed black and white children could be friends. While the majority of white kids felt the opposite. According to Dr. Melanie Killen, a renowned child psychologist contracted by AC360˚ to explain how race influences a child’s world, the reason behind this disparity is that most black parents talk to their children about race early on, whereas most white parents think that it’s better not to talk about it so that their children grow up being color-blind.
I haven’t spoken extensively about race to Vanessa, but we have had a few conversations. Sometimes I feel like she’s still too little to understand but, as evident from the CNN special, I might be wrong. What Vanessa and I have talked about mostly revolves more around the fact that the color of our skin doesn’t make us better or worse than anybody else. I’m not sure exactly how Vanessa sees herself. I mean, I’m sure she’s noticed that she’s the only dark-haired girl in her very non-Hispanic white kindergarten class, but I don’t really know what she thinks about that.
Race is an interesting topic within the Latino community. Many non-Latinos mistakenly think Latino is a race, but we know we come in all shades and colors. For many of us, in fact, it’s actually difficult to identify with just one race. That’s definitely the case with my own children who have traces of all races (except maybe Asian) running through their veins. After watching this first segment, I think I might be talking about race more regularly at home.
I’m really looking forward to watching the rest of the series (it didn’t air tonight because of the presidential primaries). Tomorrow’s segment on the judgments we make about other people based on their race and how early we start doing that shall be real interesting in the wake of Trayvon Martin‘s killing.
This is a great post. It is true, a lot of us won’t talk to our kids about race because we are not really sure if they understand. I think I will be watching this show. It sounds very interesting. Thank you!
Wow! This is an interesting article that struck a chord! I will be watching Anderson Cooper’s show tonight. I’m 1/2 Puerto Rican and 1/2 Ecuadorian, born in NY and raised in PR since I was a teenager until adulthood. So I really identify myself as a Puerto Rican. I’m married to a Black man, and of course we have a handsome, well-rounded, happy & smart 3 1/2 yr. old. We live in a small college town in South Carolina, predominantly Black and we do belong to a Mommy/Kiddie play group with some Black and White children. At daycare he’s the only mixed kid. In an effort to teach my son where he comes from I made this “heritage board”. We went on from where he was born, where Mami and Papi were born; (with the US map, PR, and South American Map) we put pics of us up, and glued some other pics of maps, and things typical to the region (flags, mango from PR, Tainos, Palmetto tree from SC, etc.)
When explaining to him that Mami was Latina and that Papi was Black… making him Black and Latino, he laughs and says “Momma, my shirt has black lines not me!” I laughed too, and left it there. This just comes to show that my child is indeed “color blind” he doesn’t see Black, White, or any other color in people. So I have to differ on children being “color blind”, I guess since he’s just too young. I’ve bought several books age appropriate that talk about “race” and “diversity”. Being Latina, I stand out, and my child being multiracial will also stand out. I don’t want him to come one day crying because someone told him something mean about his color or identity; and he didn’t know how to respond. I want him to answer ignorant questions with wise answers about his heritage, and where he comes from. In the end, this is all I care about.
Wow!! Brought tears to my eyes! I am a white mama of two white bio girls and one bi-racial girl who is adopted. Plus I am a big sister to 3 African American girls. Thank you SO much for this article. I will be sharing!
You know how I feel about this topic. As early as possible and as they can handle is how early we should talk to children about race. I haven’t watched this series, but really need to. Race has been a conversation in our house for a long time, in one way or another. I’m not saying you have to give lots of complicated information, but making kids aware even early-on, and providing them the info that they need for their appropriate stage/age, will help them understand more complicated topics later. And, as you saw for yourself, even without talking about it, the ideas enter their little heads. So, better you’re the one to introduce them to it, no?
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