Never, ever did I plan to have children, but even more far-fetched in my envisioned future was to confront pregnancy in a foreign country. Nonetheless, I fell in love and life surprised me with an extended stay along the Pacific Coast of Mexico, in my husband’s hometown. Included during this “stay” I experienced a blissful courtship, marriage, becoming a legal Mexican resident (phew, that’s finally out of the way!), and then… a positive pregnancy stick. Wait, what?

After the immediate shock wore off, I realized I was excited, inspired to be a mother. Nervous, clueless—yes, yes. Fearful… I feared not so much the pregnancy details (ignorance was bliss), but rather what was to become of my new familia. The U.S. residency process for my husband was certain to be a time-consuming challenge. What’s more, to race our baby’s birth date seemed highly unachievable. After much back-and-forth with the U.S. Consulate, we slowly began to accept that I had to do what I initially considered the impossible. And so it became that I was to have my baby in Mexico.

Throughout my pregnancy and early motherhood, I experienced many cultural differences…

Swapping Spit

I finally started showing at 8 months (bragging point).  My husband and I were out for tacos one night when we were asked to share our table with another (pregnant) couple.  “¡Claro!”  After some light conversation, the woman asked politely if we could exchange saliva.  If I’ve learned anything in my travels, it’s to be as adaptable as possible and to consider the unknown as a learning adventure.  I was happy to! I admitted I was unfamiliar with the tradition, asked if she could ‘go first’, and followed her lead by licking my thumb and touching the back of her earlobe.  She explained that this way our children would be born healthy and happy.

El ojo de venado

Neighbors, friends, family, anyone who knows you’re pregnant will give you advice. I was given a Deer’s Eye. Well, not a real one, and it wasn’t really for me; it was for our soon-to-be newborn. Our neighbor took this special seed, made it into a tiny bracelet with red beads, and told me that as long as my baby wore it, all negative vibes would be warded off.  (Phew, because I was worried!)

El hilo rojo

As with all tiny babies, hiccups are a common, adorable occurrence. The first time my sister-in-law held our hiccupping baby, she immediately ripped a piece of red string off her shirt, licked it (again with the spit) and stuck it to my infant’s forehead. “Para el hipo” she said shortly.

Qué hacer cuando le hacen ojo

After a day at the market, my husband’s family told me what I needed to do to remedy all the negative vibes that my baby absorbed that day (caused by so many people looking at him). This tradition includes a specific way to use an egg to absorb and get rid these negative vibes. In case you’d like to try it, here’s the recipe:

• 1 huevo/ 1 egg
• Albaca/ Basil
• Alcohol/ alcohol
• 1 glass cup

Instructions: Soak the egg in alcohol and basil. Massage your baby’s head and shoulders using the egg. You may dip the egg in the mix a few times, if necessary. Some say a prayer during this massage. Then, crack the egg into the cup, and the absorbed vibes will be gone. (You should see one or two “spots” within the egg—these are sure signs that it worked!)

Remedio para la mollera

Imagine your newborn being held upside down, grasped by the ankles while someone is slapping at his feet as if they were the bottom of a ketchup bottle, all the while dipping his head in water. (!?) I was with my mother-in-law, and she’d taken it upon herself to remedy our baby’s fontanel (the soft spot on his head). She was dipping his head in a jícara (a carved coconut used like a bowl). As you can imagine, my reaction as a new mamá was not calm. I was quite frightened! I addressed my concerns as kindly as possible and asked her just what she was doing to my poor baby. Evidently, this is the fix when an adult feels that a baby’s fontanel is too indented.

I’m so grateful for these encounters and I must say that in the end I’m left with so much; insight to my husband’s childhood, a better understanding of this aspect of our son’s culture, openness to alternative remedies, and humorous stories to share with my son and the world. Have you experienced a pleasant or not-so pleasant foreign cultural tradition?

Lori Jena Freise and her family live in both Mexico and the USA. You can read more blogs from her and her colleagues about translating, bilingualism, the growing language industry, and working at the Translationz office here.  You may also connect with her directly on LinkedIn.

{Photo courtesy of Lori Jena Freise}

It’s when I see toys like Fisher-Price’s Cruise and Groove Ballapalooza that I wished we were having another baby, or that my girl could regress a bit! Since I know neither one of those is happening, I can at least enjoy knowing that one of you will be able to enjoy this super fun developmental toy with your baby.

Fisher-Price really grasped that babies and toddlers love to groove and bounce to the rhythm as soon as pumping beats are played near them. Acknowledging this, they created some cool and fast-paced new rhythms that are sure to captivate your little one and get him moving to the groove.

The chiquitos will also soon realize they are rewarded with the tunes every time they drop one of the eight balls down the slide. The size is perfect for babies that are already sitting and will motivate them to pull up to stand and drop the ball from the top. Crawlers will have a blast cruising through the swinging door to get into even more “ballapalooza” action.

Even though my girl is not within the age range of the Cruise and Groove Ballapalooza, she loved testing it out and spent quite some time playing with it for this video.

Enjoy and then scroll down for your chance to win your very own Cruise and Groove Ballapalooza, courtesy of our amigos at Fisher-Price!

The Giveaway!

One lucky winner will take one Fisher-Price Cruise and Groove Ballapalooza! Just leave us a comment telling us about your kid’s favorite Fisher-Price toy and why they love it so much. Then, eneter the Rafflecopter below.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

I’ve had baby names on the mind lately, and at this late stage of my pregnancy it’s kind of hard not to. Every sharp kick, jab and foretelling Braxton Hicks contraction is a reminder to stop procrastinating and decide on something, anything, before delivery day.

For my first pregnancy four years ago, it was different, as most first pregnancies tend to be. I was so excited that I basically peed on a stick and ran to a bookstore to purchase a baby name book and started scouring baby name websites immediately in search of a name I would fall in love with. But if you’ve ever looked at one of these books or been on any of these websites, you’ll see that the possibilities are seriously endless. In much the same way I feel when I enter a multi-story department store, I was totally overwhelmed by all the categories, meanings, spelling variations, etc. etc. So many choices, too many choices, and you get to pick just one (well, two, if you use a middle name). One name that will be with your child FOREVER. So I took a breath and a step back and asked myself: Well, what do you want in a name?

Read: In The Name… of Culture?

So I started sorting things out in my head: Do I go with trendy, traditional, classic, cool, strong, sweet or unique? Should it be international, American as apple pie, or a name in Spanish picked off the family tree? Does it have to flow with our last name? How is it going to come off once he or she becomes an adult? Are there any weird nicknames that could come out of it? And importantly, if it’s English-sounding, how will the abuelos and my husband’s family in Central America pronounce or butcher it?

With the first one, once my husband and I found out we were having a girl, it made one part of our baby naming job easier. Her middle name would be the same as mine, Leonor, which is also my mother and grandmother’s name. Now that I’m an adult, I absolutely cherish this name, but truth be told, as a kid, I despised this name. It felt so old-fashioned. But that’s exactly why I love the name now, and the fact that it was passed on to me makes me feel more connected to my family and my roots. I think of my great-grandparents, and what they must have been thinking when they gave this name to my grandmother. Of course, it’s also kind of cool that in recent years, la Infanta Leonor of Spain brought the name back in vogue, and other variations of the name have become a popular choice in naming the newest little princesas of Europe.

After we settled on Leonor for a middle name, picking the all-important first name wasn’t too difficult. We wanted something that flowed nicely into the last name, so we soon settled on Kalila Leonor. Kalila is Arabic in origin. We liked the way it sounded, plus, it has a wonderful meaning: beloved. And yes, the abuelos have no trouble pronouncing it.

In the end, we went down a route that is fairly telling of our hybrid, bicultural and bilingual American-Latino lives. We were definitely very American in giving our daughter an uncommon first name, something that would distinguish her from the herd. But we are also very proud of our culture and heritage and wanted a name that reflected that. And since I already had a family name that had been passed on to me it was easy to pass along the torch.

We’ll probably go down the same route of choosing a not-so-common first name and family middle name for this new baby girl. I do have a short list, and that’s a good thing because we have a short amount of time to decide. As I write, I’m feeling those practice contractions, yikes!

How did you chose your children’s names? Did your heritage play a part in the decision?

{Photo courtesy of Cynthia Leonor Garza}

Bizarre cravings aside — like a few months ago when my intense thirst for something salty led me to slurp down pickle juice straight from the jar — this, my second pregnancy, has been marked mostly by cravings for the foods I grew up with and the wonderful and diverse sabores from all across Latin America: Tex-Mex enchiladas and chalupas covered in yellow cheese; chorizo con huevo breakfast tacos with salsa; tacos de pastor drizzled with chopped onion and cilantro and finished with a squirt of lime; media noches; ceviche peruano; fried Nicaraguan cheese and gallo pinto; dulces de leche quemada; and, of course, Frito Pie—the best Texican culinary invention ever. And this is for starters.

So when my sister-in-law accidently told me that my husband’s family was throwing me a baby shower a few weeks before I visited Miami last month, I just knew what would make my ever-growing and apparently very hungry fetus and this ever-expanding mama super happy would be a shower theme built around Latino comfort foods, drinks and desserts. After all, I think if you get the chance to have a baby shower for baby #2 or #3 or so on, you can get away from pastel colors, storks, pacifiers and delicate finger foods and pick a theme that’s going to surprise and delight everyone (yes, even the men in the room) and send them home panza llena, corazón content.

And I know, I know, for most baby showers the mom should be hands-off. I mean, if there was ever a time to let others do the work of planning and setting up, it’s when you’re pregnant. But I did that for the four awesome baby showers I was given my first go-round, and this time I had so many ideas and an apparent streak of high energy (maybe I can blame the cortaditos I drank in Miami?) that I just had to help with pulling this fete together. I figured it would also be fun to gather the girls for a comadre crafts night to make paper flowers and paper pom poms for decorations. Plus, since we already have a 3-year-old daughter, we’re pretty much set with everything we need for baby #2, so it takes the pressure off everyone in the gifts department.

We stuck with the bright beautiful trio of colors of turquoise, magenta and yellow which automatically brought in a bold and festive feel. But to make sure the “baby shower” wasn’t lost, we integrated a pink gingham ribbon throughout as a reminder of our new baby girl. The food was mostly Mexican, but we did have a smattering of Peruvian and Nicaraguan foods mixed in there, too.

Here’s how we pulled of this Latino-inspired baby shower:

The Menu:

• Tacos al pastor, carnitas y alambre
• salsa, lime wedges, chopped onion & cilantro
• Mexican tamales of pork, beef and cream cheese & jalapeño
• Layered bean dip (refried beans, sour cream, guacamole, salsa, pico de gallo and shredded cheese) served with corn tortilla chips

Drinks:

• Jarritos, assorted flavors
• Aguas Frescas de melón y sandía

Dessert Table:

• Basket filled with Assortment of Mexican candies, including obleas, leche quemada and Canel’s chicle
• Alfajores
• Nicaraguan cake
• Arroz con leche
• Pink Cupcakes

Latino-inspired Decorations:

• Paper Flowers and Paper Pom Poms for hanging
• Lavender sachets in calaveras print bag
• Mexican matchbox favors filled with baby rattle candy
• Pink maracas
• Custom food labels and invitations
• Custom-made Papel Picado-inspired cupcake toppers that read Nena, Niña, Bebita, Chavala, Escuincla, etc.
• Floral napkins and pink and turquoise colored plates

We played a few traditional baby shower games, including bilingual baby shower bingo, meaning the announcer had to translate for the non-English guests playing along. We had music, Shakira radio on Pandora, and I also pulled together a slideshow that played on repeat showing photos of my daughter, me, my husband and our parents as babies. It was fun for guests to try to figure out who was who, and my 3-year-old got a huge kick out of seeing her abuelos and parents as babies, especially the photo of her dad as a 3-month-old lying on his tummy in the buff.

With babies and toddlers there is always a time when a lullaby comes to our rescue. And yes, I mean rescue because lullabies are fundamental to sooth a crying baby or simply to create the right bedtime environment. These songs are useful not just to lull the baby to sleep but also any little brothers and sisters who may be around.

Lullabies in all languages have put to bed millions and millions of babies, all over the length and breadth of the world. All of them share the necessary elements to put the baby, and even ourselves, at ease: rhythm, melody and story. And that is precisely what fascinates me the most, that there is a story behind each one of them, a story that reveals customs, lifestyles, fears and the unique ways in which each culture values babies and toddlers.

There are many beautiful lullabies in Spanish, many of them with recurring topics such as the urgency for children to fall asleep and allow their mothers to carry on with their domestic tasks. This is the case of Este niño lindo and Duérmete mi niño.  Aruru mi niño, Muñequita Linda and other similar songs focus on conveying the baby’s beauty, while those with their origin in popular folklore, such as Arruru la faena, speak of the mother’s arduous labor.

Some lullabies like Duérmete mi niño have threatening themes involving wolves and bogeymen; others like Arriba del cielo talk about selling children. Some lullabies, like Señora Santa Ana or A la rorro nene, have been used for centuries to lull Baby Jesus in Catholic and other Christian celebrations. And, of course, there are many lullabies in English that have been translated to Spanish, as is the case of Todos los caballitos lindos (All the Pretty Little Horses).   

Regarding the lyrics, I must say that I love the use of the words “roro, rorro, arroró, aruru” used to denote rocking movement or to say that the boy or the girl is very pretty.

Not all lullabies can be found in books or the Internet. I mean those in which parents or grandparents sing from their own imagination, usually basing their songs on a familiar tune and making up their own stories as they go along. As unbelievable as it may seem, some become part of the family tradition, generation after generation.

Making up your own lullabies could be a fun activity which could help you further strengthen that essential bond of safety and trust between you and your kids, for lullabies are, without doubt, songs for the soul.

What is your favorite lullaby? Have you ever tried creating your own lullabies? Share with us; we’d love to hear from you!

{Image via Jorge Ravines Fotografias}

Adriana Pacheco Roldán, is a children’s books author who has taught Spanish as a second language for most of her professional life. She has always found news ways to teach Spanish, not only as a tool for communication, but as a tool for developing critical ways of thinking and understanding culture, history and traditions. With her husband she founded Heritage Language, a publisher of bilingual books. She is currently a doctoral student of Hispanic American Literature at the University of Texas at Austin. Adriana was born in Puebla, Mexico, and she is very proud of having raised three multilingual and multicultural boys and one girl.

Photo by Indiewench

I guess I never really made the correlation, but as I meet more people raising their children bilingual and I read more about the whole concept, it truly makes a lot of sense that those who use the OPOL (one parent-one language) method, have found it incredibly beneficial to also teach their children sign language.

Recently, we dedicated a whole week to the topic of the OPOL method since we realized this is the one the majority of you are using. We were pretty happy with the results. Thanks to your feedback, which was amazing, we realized there are many topics we really need to concentrate on – and one of them is using sign language as a bridge between two other languages.

In case you don’t recall, in our guest post during OPOL Week, AnaGloria Rodriguez, who is raising two bilingual (English/Spanish) children mentioned the usage of sign language by saying this:

“We learned ASL so that the family would have one language in common.”

This statement pretty much summarizes the reason why so many parents using the OPOL method also use baby sign language.

A Bridge Between Two Languages

According to Monta Briant – author of Baby Sign Language Basics and Sign, Sing, and Play!- who has been teaching sign language to children and their parents since 2001, it makes sense to many parents raising bilingual children because it connects both languages.

Monta Briant

“It helps them realize that there is more than one way to say the same thing,” she said. “It really helps sort out that leche and milk mean the same things, thanks to the solid representation made through signing.”

The beauty of the whole concept is that there is only one sign that means milk or leche in sign language. It is important, however, to point out that there are many variations of sign language depending on the country and region where it is used. Since we live in the U.S., we’re only really talking about American Sign Language (ASL).

“Sign language makes it easier to learn both languages because it expands on what every baby – and adult – already does naturally,” Briant explained. “Research has actually shown that a baby being raised bilingual will learn both languages quicker when also using sign language. It’s just very natural for babies.”

One common concern that parents have – which really is a concern of parents considering bilingualism to raise their children no matter what combination of languages they plan on using, and ASL is considered a language – is that their children will get confused. As we’ve mentioned in the past, this is a myth and it needs to be debunked!

Briant, who’s raising bilingual children herself, said a lot of parents also worry that using sign language with their babies will actually delay their speech development – another common misconception related to raising bilingual kids.

“Sign language actually promotes and increases speech development,” she said. “Many parents have said to me: ‘If they can use their hands (to communicate) why would they bother to talk?’ But if you think about it, talking is a lot easier than signing. Plus, why then would speech language pathologists use sign language as part of therapy for children with delayed speech?”

It usually goes back to uninformed people making erroneous assumptions. If you’ve been following SpanglishBaby for a while, you know all of us in this bilingual journey face an uphill battle when it comes to comments made by those unfamiliar with this subject.

Another incredible benefit of using sign language, according to Briant, is that as children get older and maybe they forget a word here and there in the minority language, signing can be used as a hint to trigger their memory – instead of the highly discouraged method of simply translating.

Coming Up…

Following is a sneak peek at what we’ve prepared for the rest of the week. As always, we hope you find this info useful and remember we encourage you to leave comments, questions or to just share your own experiences. After all, this is the best way for all of us to learn!

• TUESDAY – Our weekly Ask an Expert series with a question specifically related to sign language and raising bilingual kids answer by Simona Montanari, one of our very own experts.
• WEDNESDAY – A guest post from one of our loyal readers – and a fellow mamá bloguera. She will tell us about her own journey using sign language to help in the process of raising her two bilingual children. You won’t want to miss this one!
• THURSDAY - A list of resources/articles/websites compiled specifically for those of you using or thinking about using sign language to raise your children bilingual.

G-I-V-E-A-W-A-Y

We are so grateful to Monta Briant who has been kind enough to give us two copies of her book, Baby Sign Language Basics, one in English and one in Spanish, so we can give away to two lucky winners. All you have to do is leave us a comment sharing something about using sign language to raise bilingual kids, whether it be a question, a concern, a challenge, a tip, pros/cons, an anecdote, anything that will add to the online conversation about this topic.

This giveaway will end Thursday, Aug. 6th at midnight EST. Make sure you’re subscribed either by RSS or email so you don’t miss out on this highly informative and useful week.

Giveaway rules.

Photo by Bethany L King

Although we are – THANK GOD – past this stage at our house, some of you might be thinking about starting potty training or maybe are in the middle of it right now and if you are Latina, you might be able to relate to the following story. Besides, I’ll be going through it all over again soon, as I am four months pregnant with my second child!! So, I figured this is as good a time as any to reminisce about how it all used to be and remind myself of how it all will be in the not-too-far away future. Once you’re done reading this, I’ll tell you one HUGE reason why holding off potty training for another month is a good idea…besides pissing your mothers off

That was then…

I don’t know if this is some kind of Latina thing or what. A little while before my daughter’s first birthday, my mother started her daily reminders of how by the time her kids turned uno, “ya no usaban pañales.” How did she do that? I have no idea, but it should suffice to say that she had the help of a full-time nanny who lived with us!

Anyhow, this is the way my mother greets me on a pretty regular basis:

- “¿La sentaste?” (meaning, did you sit her on the potty chair?)

I ignore her.

- “You have to follow her around with the basenica,” she continues con la misma cantaleta. Actually, the correct spelling is basinica, my mother’s name for potty chair, but she doesn’t like to say it like that.

I ignore her.

“Ya va a cumplir DOS años,” she says almost embarrassed that she’s almost two and still wears diapers, ¡ni que fuera SU hija!

Since I’m ignoring her, she decides to talk directly to Vanessa.

- “This summer, you’ll be out of diapers.” Vanessa just looks at her and smiles.

I stop ignoring her and start attacking her.

- “Claro, since you’ll be the one taking care of that…” I let her have it as I roll my eyes.

It kills me when my mom does this to me. She makes me feel crappy, like I’m not putting enough effort into helping my daughter – who understands every single thing she hears even when you’re not talking to her – use panties once and for all. In fact, nothing would make me happier!

I hate this task, especially because rare is the time when Vanessa actually allows me to change her diaper without making it a wrestling match – which unbelievably, I almost always end up losing. I’ve ran out of things to say or do to distract her to avoid smearing poop all over the place. In fact, I actually dread the moment I have to change her diaper! So, it should be obvious, that no one would want her to make the transition more than I. But truth be told, it is not that easy. Yet, definitely de éste verano no pasa. It will happen before the summer is over.

Unfortunately, everything points to failure. We’ve actually gone back backwards in the process. When I bought the potty and I started teaching Vanessa what it was about, everything was going viento en popa. In fact, I was blown away with how quickly she learned to say “caca” when she wanted to poop and we’d go sit on the potty and for the most part, things actually came out fine, pardon the pun. These days, she doesn’t say a word to me and if I happen to notice she wants to go “caca,” just the mere mention of the word, makes her run away screaming “nooooooo.” ¡Qué exagerada!

I think what set us back has been the rotten weather. It’s cold and the majority of our house is carpeted, so the idea of leaving Vanessa roam naked so she can understand what’s happening – like some have suggested – doesn’t really appeal to me. Totalmente asqueroso, ¿no creen? Whatever… the point is that now that the summer is almost here, I’m going to take heed, but only when we’re in the kitchen or family room which have hardwood floors.

In the  meantime, I’ll have to continue putting up with my mother’s cantaleta:

- “Ya no la sientas, ¿no?” she asks in defeat when she comes through the door. Not even a ‘hello.’ – “Of course I do,” I lie entre dientes.

Am I the only one going through this?

This is now…

I’m happy to report that Vanessa has actually been off diapers for almost 6 months, although not completely. She still wears them at night and now that I know what Unicef and Pampers are doing, I’m in no rush to change that (and you shouldn’t either, at least until the campaign ends on May 1, 2009). I hope you feel the same once you find out what their “One Pack = One Vaccine” campaign is all about.

Pampers and acclaimed Latina actress Salma Hayek have joined forces with Unicef to help protect mothers and their newborns against tetanus in less-industrialized countries.

Your part in the equation? It’s actually pretty simple because just by buying a specially-marked pack of Pampers diapers or wipes, you could be saving someone’s life. Each qualified product purchased means one life-saving vaccine.

The numbers are staggering. Did you know that maternal and neonatal tetanus (MNT), a preventable disease, claims the lives of approximately 128,000 infants and up to 30,000 mothers in less industrialized nations each year? That amounts to  one newborn death every four minutes. The key word here? Preventable. So, lets do our part.

SpanglishBaby strongly supports this campaign and we’re urging all our readers to do the same by either purchasing these products or spreading the word – or both!

To help get you started, Pampers has put together a set of four (4) “One Pack = One Vaccine” campaign onesies as well as a coupon for a specially-marked pack of diapers which we’ll be giving away to one lucky winner.

How to win:

Leave us a comment telling us your funny potty-training story or, if you haven’t gone through that rite of passage yet, what you dread about the thought of it.

For the part that nobody likes, but we’ve gotta have, check out the Giveaway Rules.

This giveaway ends at midnight EST on Sunday, April 12th. Good luck to all!