“He’s confused.”
This seems to be the refrain of my interactions with monolinguals these days. Talking is the big milestone for two-year-olds and would be the topic of conversation even if I weren’t speaking Spanish with my son. Because I am, though, it feels like a rather contentious subject.
SpanglishBaby readers are already familiar with the debate over code-switching and its role in fluency. We know that experts confirm that mixing languages is a sophisticated linguistic skill, not a sign of confusion. Still, getting this across to those outside our like-minded community (and feeling like we have to) can cause more stress than it’s worth.
Instead of sharing in the excitement over my hijito’s new words, the English speakers in my life hesitate to applaud him. Despite knowing plenty of bilingual adults, they don’t quite believe my mL@H method will work. What exactly they predict will happen instead is anybody’s guess. The fear that bilingualism strikes in some of my acquaintances apparently allows them to imagine that my son is going to be a mute and end up knowing zero languages rather than two.
“Don’t confuse everyone else.”
This statement more accurately reflects what people are saying when they comment on one child’s strange and indecipherable speech patterns. Everyone is afraid of that which s/he does not understand. By choosing to raise our children to be bilingual, we thrust this reality into the faces of onlookers. Parenting, as we know, invites excess onlookers. Furthermore, parenting decisions that are anything but mainstream open a proverbial “can of worms.” In the culturally-defensive, linguistically-delayed America, we can expect a lot of worms to come crawling out when there are witnesses to our Spanish use.
I love being able to communicate with my little one in public without worrying about eavesdroppers. I don’t like overhearing the details of other mothers’ conversations with their kids and I wouldn’t want just anyone to find a way into the mundane details of my parent-child dealings.
Despite what they with the big oídos and even bigger bocas may think, I am not trying to confuse everyone else. I am speaking to my child in the language that I have used with him since birth, and that is our business. No, I am not talking about you when I speak to him in Spanish.
“The Spanish will confuse him when he goes to school.”
I cannot wait for this one to be debunked. Certainly, some bilingual children appear to struggle in preschool and the early elementary years. From my tutoring experience and hearsay, though, I realize that this is yet another misunderstanding. Imagine this:
You place an English book in front of a monolingual English speaker (6 years old). He doesn’t have to guess what language the book is written in or consider the order of the words. It will reflect what he has heard in speech. All he has to do is learn to recognize the letters in print and start to pronounce them.
You place the same English book in front of a bilingual speaker of the same age. He must go through an identical process of putting letters together, but then decide which set of grammar and pronunciation rules these words follow before he can make the leap to comprehension.
Is it surprising or worrisome that the second child will take longer to learn to read?
By the same token, should we worry when our newly verbal, bilingual toddlers take longer to put together complex sentences than their monolingual counterparts?
Obviously, the answer is no.
Bilingualism, like integrity and money sense, is another tool we give our children to prepare them for the rest of their lives. It deserves merely positive scrutiny, and the only thing that warrants true confusion is why there aren’t more code-switching, “confused” children in this country.
You go girl! I love this post Chelsea and just want to plaster it all over the virtual world, the physical world and everywhere in between!
Our 18-year-old is recently taking tutor lessons via Skype with a My Personal Language Tutor from Costa Rica, and even though his Dad is a Latino, he has heard Spanish since birth, and he used to speak Spanish so well in high school (during class) that his teachers would call me to tell me how bilingual he was this kid “tiene miedo” of his language! ¡Qué pena!
Let’s get this country on board for the reality of future success – English only is no longer the norm!
.-= Beth Butler´s last blog ..Happy Earth Day! ¡Feliz día de la tierra! It’s Been Earth Month on our Boca Beth Web Site all Month! =-.
Well Said! I can totally relate. Though I live in an area where there is very- and I mean very- little diversity, I have been lucky enough to be surrounded by people that are more open to the idea of raising a child bilingual. In fact, because they know I am raising my kids bilingual using the OPOL method, I have been asked of ways to help their children learn a second language. That being said, I still so often run into those close minded monolinguals that think I am confusing my child. Year right I am! They are grown to be some pretty smart-bilingual (and maybe in the future multilingual) children!
.-= Lisa Renata´s last blog ..My Super Hero, Oh my! and more… :: Hay mi Super Heroe! y mas… =-.
I have been thinking about the topics mentioned in this article all day. Well said and all so true.
It takes guts to make a commitment like the one you have made, Chelsea! I truly believe people react negatively when they don´t understand. I just have never been one to judge the decision a mother makes about how to parent her children and it´s difficult for me to understand why anyone will judge bilingualism.
they just don´t understand..
.-= Ana Lilian´s last blog ..Tengo Miedo de Your Language =-.
Where we live, in Houston Texas, there are many many bilingual people around (and not just in Spanish). Yet even here people can be negative and not understand why we want our children to be really bilingual. Thank you Chelsea and Spanglishbaby for the positive voices.
Hi mates, its great artcle on thee topic of teachingand completely explained, keep iit up all the time.