I’m trying to raise bilungual kids as well. I have a 4yr old daughter and a 1yr old son. I feel like a total failure when it comes to my daughter speaking Spanish. She’s fallen behind and she’s also extremely strong willed so it’s tough for me to teach her. She understands Spanish and will say single words. As for forming sentences, well that’s the issue. I know the best way for her to learn is by applying games and making it fun. I just don’t know what kind of games will help her and my son. My wife only speaks English, but she does help me out by repeating words I say. She does a pretty good job (we’re both from Miami so she’s done well understanding and repeating words). Both my kids have Spanish books but the English books around here outnumber the Spanish. I play Spanish songs and she loves them. But it’s still not enough. My big concern is that I’ve missed the window for her to roll her ‘r’ properly. She can’t do that yet. Is there still a chance for her? What books, games, songs, tv can I show them? I’m thinking about getting a tutor to help her but haven’t started looking yet. I really appreciate your time.
Thank you,
Frank
Hi Frank,
I hear your frustration… I can assure you that you are anything but a failure – you have only just begun the long journey of raising bilingual kids! So don’t give up…!
If it’s any consolation, I had a similar struggle with my son when he was around 3-4 years-old. His receptive language was very good (i.e., he understood practically everything in Spanish), but his productive language was limited. Not only that, but he actively refused to speak in Spanish, and he resisted reading or watching TV in Spanish. I can tell you that now, at 8 years-old, he is doing MUCH better (you can see for yourself by viewing some of Niko’s videos in Spanish on our YouTube channel).
How did this transformation happen? I wish I could say with certainty. I will tell you that we just kept on speaking to him in Spanish, reading in Spanish (when he wasn’t too resistant), and exposing him to the language on TV and in movies. At some point he started to identify with my husband’s Colombian culture (he told a classmate on the school bus that he was Colombian!), and even using Spanish words here and there. Productive language continues to be a challenge, so two years ago we enrolled him in a heritage language Spanish school on Saturdays (he doesn’t love it, but that’s ok!)
With your children, the key is patience and consistency. It’s best not to show your frustration if your kids resist your efforts. I found it better to use “tricks” like reverse psychology (i.e., “I am so glad I get to read this great book all by myself!”) and pick and choose your battles. You can also access many excellent online games and videos. Here’s a quick list (you can access my entire collection on my Delicious bookmark page or on my website):
Your daughter’s accent can be improved with more access to hearing the language. It is not too late for her to develop a native-like accent. I can’t tell from your post, but it seems as if you are the native speaker of Spanish and your wife is a native English speaker. If this is the case, you should speak Spanish to your kids, and your wife can speak in English. According to research, this is the best way to develop a balanced bilingual. If you speak to her mainly in Spanish, you shouldn’t need to hire a tutor.
I hope this helps, Frank. You can do this! Stick with it and you’ll see the results. Buena surety!
Lori
Lori is spot on Frank! Her encouragement is sincere and well-founded. With our son, who is now almost 20, we went through peaks and valleys with his Spanish (my native language is English, and my ex-husbands native language was Spanish).
I recall for months Matthew would speak only English; refusing to speak in Spanish pushed my buttons, and he knew it! Then, as he matured and realized the coolness of knowing more than English, being asked to help in class at times with the Spanish language he began to embrace it more.
You will have an “aha” day as I did when Matthew’s high school Spanish teacher called me to remark with enthusiasm over how fluent / qué bilingüe mi hijo was! Your day will come – as your children roll their r’s and speak Spanish with pride. All in due time Frank, all in due time!
Hey! You sound like me. I worry about how well I am teaching my kids Spanish. Of course I am not a native speaker and neither is my husband. He speaks English and Russian, which he is teaching with me to our kids. I do have a large Hispanic community in our neighborhood. They have a lot of Spanish-speaking friends. It makes the difference. They are doing much better now. My oldest has been a little more difficult to work with on his learning to speak Spanish. It has been a bit of a struggle. He wanted to learn German, which is my great grandma’s native language. So I made a compromise. If he worked on Spanish, I would help him get into some German. I started with Spanish, because I thought it would be easier given that I grew up with hearing my dad using his high school Spanish. I used what I learned from him to take a Spanish class in high school and did well. I felt comfortable and thought I would be better off trying to teach them something I felt at ease with speaking. I only have a second grade reading level, but it is enough to read to my kids and understand some of what is being said when I play music and movies in Spanish. I love Spanish and all the languages we are learning. It is so amazing taking in all the parts of the language and culture as l put together lessons and homework packets. I try to have some puzzles and pictures to color. It keeps things fun and interesting. We also learn songs and poems. We are also learning sign, Chinese, and French. Sign language helped me develops the kids communication skills when they were younger. It helps us have real quiet time. French is something I started learning from my great aunt when I was little. She speaks French. Chinese was something my youngest son heard in his reading class when they were talking about different cultures. He really likes it, so I started him out on Chinese on mango languages. He is doing pretty well. Well, good luck in your endeavors. -Ellen-
I´ve got a similar situation. Kids about the same age, only Spanish is the first language and Dutch the second (which I speak to them). What always keeps them motivated is speaking thru Skype with family members that don´t speak the other language (Spanish). Same with going on holiday to ¨the other country¨ where the people only speak the other language (in my case Dutch). Kids are there and want to play with other kids so they really understand the need of learning that language and as they are ´immersed´ they improve enormously. A holiday to my home country keeps my 5 year old motivated for another year!